Networking for People Who Hate Networking
For many recent graduates, the word networking conjures images of awkward small talk, business cards, and forced smiles at crowded events. If that makes your stomach turn, you’re not alone. But the truth is, networking doesn’t have to feel fake or transactional, and it’s one of the most important tools you’ll use in your early career.
Here’s how to approach it in a way that feels natural, especially if you’re not the extroverted, hand-shaking type.
Rethink What Networking Actually Is
Forget the idea that networking is about impressing people or “selling” yourself. At its core, networking is simply about building genuine professional relationships. It’s about being curious, staying open, and making connections over time, not collecting contacts like trophies.
If you’ve ever asked someone for advice, reached out on LinkedIn, or had a conversation with a colleague about their role, guess what? You’ve already been networking.
Start with People You Know
You don’t have to start with strangers. Classmates, former teachers, family friends, and Ashbourne alumni all count. Reconnecting with someone you already know can feel more relaxed and provide a great entry point into new industries or opportunities. Don’t underestimate the power of a simple message: “Hi, I’ve been thinking about careers in media, and I remembered you mentioned working in publishing. Would you be open to a quick chat?”
People are often more willing to help than you expect, especially if they were once in your shoes.
Go for Conversations, Not Contacts
Instead of trying to meet as many people as possible at an event, aim for one or two meaningful conversations. Ask questions like:
– What drew you to your current role?
– What surprised you most about working in this industry?
– What advice would you give someone just starting out?
Genuine curiosity goes a long way. People remember how you made them feel, not how polished your elevator pitch was.
Use Online Platforms (Without the Cringe)
LinkedIn can be a useful tool when used with intention. Don’t worry about sounding overly professional. A short, polite message explaining why you’re reaching out is enough.
Example: “Hi [Name], I’m a recent graduate interested in environmental policy, and I really enjoyed your article on sustainability in urban planning. Would love to connect.” The key is authenticity, not perfection.
Play to Your Strengths
Not everyone thrives in big crowds, and that’s okay. If you’re better one-on-one, focus on coffee chats or online messages. If you’re more of a listener than a talker, ask thoughtful questions and follow up later with a message. There’s no one “right” way to network.
Keep Track (Without Making It Weird)
If someone gives you advice, follow up with a thank-you message a week or two later. If something they said helped you make a decision or take a step, let them know. These small acts of appreciation help build relationships that last longer than a single interaction.
How Ashbourne Can Still Support You
Many Ashbourne College alumni find that their strongest connections start right at home. Whether it’s reaching out to former tutors, reconnecting with peers, or hearing about opportunities through the wider alumni community, your sixth form network is a powerful starting point. Ashbourne is still here to help you navigate your next steps, even if it’s just by pointing you in the right direction.
Final Thought: Networking Isn’t a Performance
You don’t need to be the loudest person in the room or have a perfectly rehearsed pitch. You just need to be yourself, stay curious, and be willing to put yourself out there, one conversation at a time.
Networking doesn’t have to feel like something you “have to” do. Done right, it becomes something that simply grows with you.
If you are interested in more tips on how to manage life after school and university, you can read our post on the reality vs expectation of your first year at work.
1. What does networking actually mean for recent graduates?
Networking isn’t about collecting contacts or giving a perfect pitch. It’s about building genuine relationships, asking questions, and staying curious about other people’s experiences.
2. Can I start networking with people I already know?
Yes, networking often begins with classmates, family friends, teachers, or alumni. Reaching out to people you’re already connected with is a natural way to explore industries and gain advice.
3. How can I network if I dislike big events?
You don’t have to attend crowded networking sessions. One-on-one coffee chats, online conversations, or smaller meetups can be just as effective, sometimes even more meaningful.
4. Is LinkedIn useful for networking if I’m not confident online?
Yes, LinkedIn can be a powerful tool when used authentically. A short, polite message explaining why you’re reaching out is often enough to make a connection.